Turboheaven: Euphausia

[smokeandglasses]

No meme rn because Metaphor is sitting on my desktop waiting for me to play it

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[smokeandglasses]

[He plops down on the ground next to her, crossing his legs and trying to find a comfortable way to sit.

Then he closes his eyes and tries to steady his breathing.]

Like this?

[trifocal]

Yes. If your mind starts to wander, try to bring your attention back to your breathing.

[ she'll close her eyes too, but she'll try to stay aware of her surroundings, to see if he's actually relaxing. ]

[smokeandglasses]

[Well, he can try that at least. Focus on his breathing...

Focusing on his breathing makes him more aware of his heartbeat, which makes him think of someone else entirely. Do they still share the same heartbeat? Or has that connection been severed now that they're dead? Is he in some other part of heaven, going through what Ali's experiencing here? Or has he already been killed a second time? Concord is physically strong, but it wouldn't be too hard to lure him into a trap. If their heartbeats are still connected Ali would have felt if something happened, but he hasn't felt anything unusual yet, which means either Concord is fine or they're not connected anymore, and the fact that this is now a Schrodinger's unicorn situation is driving him crazy-

He grimaces, and moves back to focusing on his breathing. Meditation is hard for someone who overthinks all the time.]

[trifocal]

[ ......

she opens her eyes and glances over. ]

Are you finding it difficult to relax?

[smokeandglasses]

...yes.

[He sighs.]

I think too much all the time.

[trifocal]

There's nothing wrong with that, but it will make it difficult to achieve calmness...

Is there something troubling you in particular?

[smokeandglasses]

[Well. Su Waner did tell him to open up more, so.]

Mostly thinking about my partner and our kids. He died at the same time I did, so I thought he would be here too, but he's not. And the kids are still alive on top of that, so I worry about how they're handling losing both of their parents at the same time.

[trifocal]

Oh... I see.

[ her expression softens. ]

What was he like?

[smokeandglasses]

He was an idiot. Despite being big and strong, he was soft-hearted and cared about everyone and everything. He'd give his last shirt to someone if they asked him to. And he would take so many stupid risks to save everyone and make everyone happy, and even if things didn't work out he would just say something like "I had to try". And even though he was getting sicker and sicker, he wouldn't try any way I found to improve his health, just saying some nonsense like "this is how things are supposed to be." And somehow I was the bad guy for trying-

[He suddenly stops his rant, because he feels moisture gathering at the corners of his eyes. He just wipes it away without addressing it.]

[trifocal]

[ oh. hmm. ]

... I am sorry. You must miss him so.

Was it the sickness, in the end...?

[ that caused him to die? ]

[smokeandglasses]

No, it wasn't sickness. We got caught in a shootout between some criminals and the police and died.

[All of that effort to keep his guy alive, and then he just went and got shot a bunch anyway.]

[trifocal]

Ah...

[ does she know what police are? well, she kind of knows what context cues are. ]

I am sorry. That must have been shocking.

[smokeandglasses]

It was very much so. I didn't expect things to end so suddenly, right in the middle of all of my work.

[Will his daughter be able to carry on his work? It's not like he kept thorough notes on everything. Just another one of the million worries on his mind.]

[trifocal]

What kind of work was it...?

[smokeandglasses]

Trying to repair the world. To rid it of pollution, and return it back to its healthy state.